When the World Around You Feels Rushed,You Can Take Time to Reflect

We are living in a culture and a time where people expect immediacy, whatever the topic at hand. You want groceries delivered to your house? Order them via app and receive them in 10 minutes. You want to learn a new language? Sign up for an online course which guarantees you can start today and be conversational in 4 weeks. Learn about a new job/client opportunity? Reply ASAP to be sure you have the highest chance of success. And while I agree that in some circumstances immediacy is hugely valuable and convenient, (I do, after all, use many taxi and car sharing apps, grocery delivery, and the like,) it’s not always necessary.

Take our working lives, for example. We’re now faced with the complete blending of our home and professional lives. And I don’t just mean how I tell my clients that they are one person whether at work or at home (no need to put on your mask and pretend otherwise when you walk through the door of the conference room). The blend of our lives means that all things that were important in one area of our life or another can now feel more urgent or pressing, since it is continuously in your present awareness. There is no break from one or the other to reattune your to do's for the day.

Want to get the laundry done? Well, you do have 5 minutes between your first and second call of the day, and you are looking at your laundry basket every time you walk into the bathroom. Need to reply to that email from your client? Well, your child will take at least 20 minutes to brush their teeth before getting ready for bed. And on and on.

Rather than being able to calibrate genuine urgency or importance, our lives have become enmeshed so that it is difficult to decipher what is truly essential to get done today and what can wait.

I have this sensation each and every time I work with a new client. I know that every “best practice” tells me to be prompt in my replies and to get back to people as quickly as possible so that they know they are important, or that their issue or challenge is important to me. But the reality is that I am not always ready to reply immediately. I am only a human and have a hundred things swirling in my head at all times and sometimes I just need time to sit with information or ideas before simply replying or taking action.

So often throughout my life I have tried to play in to the pressurized game of immediacy. And as a result I have felt out of alignment, insecure, and overwhelmed. I know that people are waiting on me, and the pressure of every minute that passes without a reply builds up. But the reality very often is, I am not yet certain how to reply. And so I take my time.

And while it’s a difficult battle to wage, especially in a serviced-based business working with senior executives who face hundreds of difficult decisions every day, it is how I can show up as my best and offer valuable insights or perspectives.

And so, I reject the theory of immediacy, even as I find myself playing into it. And I give permission, not only to myself, but to each one of you who is reading this, to grant yourself the time you need to be thoughtful and intentional in your actions, even if it means you might disappoint some people along the way.

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