What's the Weight of an Unlived Dream?

What's the weight of sitting on an idea or dream you truly want to bring to life, but can't quite bring yourself to do?

The painting you haven't finished (or even started). The screenplay you've been joking about for years but haven't actually had the guts to write. The book that's been building up inside you but hasn't seen the light of day.

Those dreams we create and dream of, maybe even joke about (to take the edge off), but are deeply afraid of actually bringing to life.

Why would you be afraid? You want to do it, so what's fear got to do with it?

Well, for one, there's an inherent danger in bringing a perfectly crafted idea from your mind into being. It might be beautiful as a dream, but bringing it to life may not match the image in your head. But there are deeper reasons this feels so fear-inducing.

What if you start to write only to find out you can't actually write? Or your idea isn't as interesting as you thought? What if you pour hours or days or weeks into a project and don't love the end result? What if the thing you keep thinking about doesn't work out how you hoped?

Or, what if it works out even better than you expected and you'd be forced to change things in your life?

The status quo is easy to operate in. It requires little energy, little effort to maintain. We just keep going. But the truth is, our lives are anything but static. We are constantly changing. And so are the circumstances around us - jobs, friends, relationships, politics, the economy. Nothing is ever really stable.

So why do we believe that hiding from our dreams somehow saves us the trouble of needing to change?

I know for me, in my creative endeavors, there's always the fear: "What if no one shows up?" What if I create a new program and no one says yes? What if I launch a book or an event and no one buys in? Rather than face that fear, I often dream about it, create it in my mind, even plan for it - but hesitate to take the very first step that would bring it to life. Because if I don't actually do it, I can't fail at it.

But the truth is quite the opposite. The moment we take action on the dreams and ideas that live in our heads is the moment we start to actually learn something valuable. We spend so much time living in the fear that something won't succeed, we miss the entire point: we will learn so much more from starting than we ever can from planning.

Just taking the first step already teaches us about who we are, about courage, about what we know and what we don't know. Just putting the first brush stroke on the page reveals information - what colors you like, what intensity of stroke, what texture the paper has, how the color flows seamlessly (or not). Putting the first words onto the page of a story you've been yearning to tell teaches you about prose, how to share ideas, what helps you get into a flow (or not).

Action is the antidote to self-doubt. Taking the first step means you can no longer relish the thought process of "what if." You have clear evidence and learning already. You will never again worry about what those first few words will look or sound like. You will already have evidence and experience to lean on.

So go and experiment. Try out those ideas you've been shying away from. Do them badly, but do them just the same. Because that's where you'll learn what it takes to become the person who does the thing they say they want to do. That's where you build trust in yourself that you are a person of action, that you can get things done, that you move the needle on your dreams rather than living in fear of them failing (or worse, succeeding). Build your evidence, build your inner knowledge database, build your experience. Experiment, fail, succeed, and keep trying the thing.

Don't let thinking paralyze you or hold you back from creating. Let yourself do what scares you - that niggling inside that you know you want to bring to life. Do it today. Don't let that open loop remain on repeat in your mind any longer. Take action. Close the loop. And find out what the next question is.

More often than not, you'll be surprised at what you learn.

We're coming up to the end of the year - that liminal space where we reflect on what was and dream about what could be. But here's what I want you to consider: don't wait until January 1st to become the person who takes action on their dreams. Start now. Take one step today. So that when you step into 2025, you already know yourself as someone who moves toward what they want, rather than away from what they fear.

You don't have to do this alone. If you need support navigating what's next - whether that's clarity on what you truly want to create, or the courage to take that first scary step - I'm here.

Schedule a chat with me to explore what longer-term coaching support might look like as you build the future you're dreaming of.

What are you creating today? Hit reply and let me know what you're working on. I'll be rooting for you from my cozy armchair here in London. I know you can do this.

With love,

Amanda